Overheard in the Waiting Room

‘For thorn pricks and hacks
got from hard fieldwork, apply
heated cobblers wax.

Shake off whooping cough
by placing frogs or cooked mice
in the struck child’s mouth

or pass the youngster
three times under a donkey –
that’s the last you’ll hear.

Treat worms with raisins
completely steeped in whiskey,
which relieves most things

though warts need weather –
Mother Nature’s remedy
some fresh rain water.

For farcy, whisper
The Lord’s Prayer backwards in
the sick horse’s ear.

Be sure, however,
those old scolds don’t learn of it –
the priest and doctor.’